the goodness in inadequacy

We are so often consumed by our lack thereof….

Our lack of knowledge… our lack of productivity…. our lack of finances… lack of acceptance… lack of direction… motivation… control…. peace… happiness… The list goes on.

Or maybe this is you…

If I could just lose 10 lbs… If I could just cut 5 seconds off my 5k I could place and my coach will acknowledge me. It’s the holidays… I should be more grateful. If I can just make it through the semester I’ll be okay. When I graduate – then my parents will tell me they’re proud of me. If I could just get through my to-do list, I’ll be able to enjoy my day off.

We beat ourselves up from the inside out. We sit and obsess over the what-ifs and if-onlys… and often times we don’t even realize we are subconsciously wishing we could chip away little pieces of ourselves and our lives.

But what if I told you all of your perceived shortcomings and insecurities could provide you with more than shame, anxiety, and guilt? They can provide you with freedom.

When we think like this… our lack thereof, our worries, and our insecurities have more control over us than our passions and our purpose. Our lives are so often unknowingly driven by insecurity and fear of what we are or think we are missing, rather than motivated and encouraged by what we have.

The truth is… Your anxiety will not be cured come Christmas break. Your to-do list will always grow. Your relationships will not be fixed in an instant. You will never be the perfect daughter, student, employee, or person. Kind of harsh, huh?

You cannot do it all….

Good news, though!

You don’t have to! Thank goodness!!!

You DON’T have to do it all. You don’t have to “fix” every situation or accomplish every task known to man.

You don’t have to prove your worth to any family member, friend, classmate, teacher, boss, or stranger by making a certain amount of money, looking a certain way, making the grades, or accomplishing any number of things.

You feel as if you are not enough. Embrace it. You are not enough for everyone around you. And that is okay.

You don’t need to be good enough for anyone except for yourself and Jesus.

I am an imperfect person, yet I am still good enough for the Lord! The Lord tells us in 2 Corinthians that His grace is more than enough. Because we are imperfect, His power is all the more glorious.

Can you imagine trying to be perfect for each person you come across? For every event? For every interaction?

That’s alot of different kinds of perfect… alot of different versions of yourself…

Thankfully, though, you only need to be one version of yourself.

The Lord instructs us in Ecclesiastes 9:7 to go on with a cheerful heart because He has already accepted us. Wow…

Even me? The student-athlete who transferred after one year at the DI level… the collegiate runner who never placed in a conference meet… the daughter who still lives at home… the granddaughter who doesn’t call enough… the friend who often forgets to check in… and the christian who struggles daily with sin? Yes, especially you.

So now what?!

Here are a few reminders for when you are feeling consumed by your perceived inadequacy and overwhelming anxiety…

• you do not need to be enough for anyone other than yourself.
• in the eyes of Jesus, you are enough, because He makes us whole. know & remember your identity in Him.
• most people are too busy worrying about themselves to worry about what you’re doing, so take your freedom and do what you want! because you deserve it!
• give yourself a little grace! you deserve it!
• others’ opinions of you are out of your control – so figure out who you are, love her, and own her.
• and when you forget who you are… remind yourself! over & over again!
• it’s okay to not know who you are or who you are supposed to be. you can reinvent yourself as many times as you need.
• don’t be so hard on yourself! you are learning & you are growing.
• God doesn’t want perfection from you. He only wants a relationship.
• you are just as worthy of the love you offer those around you. do not settle!
• feeling as if you can do better can be good… it means you can do more! it means you are meant for more! you have a bigger calling! don’t beat yourself up over a sign you can & will do more with your life. get excited knowing you have been called.

& here are a few of my own practices / tips & tricks as a recovering anxious, insecure, and too-hard-on-herself people-pleaser…

• practice affirmations. daily.
• write it down! get your thoughts out!
• distract yourself with positivity! – pick up a hobby! try something new! do something nice for someone!
• get some of that nervous energy out… move your body! dance it out!
• practice gratitude. daily.
• talk to someone you can trust!
• get outside! remind yourself the world is much bigger than you.
• don’t forget the basic self-care… shower. eat. nap.
• pray. about any and everything.